“I” and “do” are two very powerful words. They are part of a sacred vow that binds you to another person. The words should be preceded by “till death do us part,” but it seems as if that statement could easily be replaced by “till we decide to file for divorce” in today’s society.
Marriage isn’t something that should be taken lightly. It’s not just a phase in your life, not something that you are simply crossing off a checklist, but rather a means of making yourself a more complete person. Marriage is about finding a person who you are willing to share your journey on this earth with, and it’s a serious and life-changing choice that I won’t be making anytime soon.
My decision to wait until I get married has nothing to do with making sure I do all of those “25 things to do before you get engaged” that bloggers across the internet continually claim are better than finding that one special person. I could travel the world, get a tattoo or even eat an entire jar of Nutella with or without a wedding band on my finger. In fact, all those things would probably be more fun with that “special person” by my side.
It’s also not because I have a jaded view on love and marriage; it’s quite the opposite. I still believe it’s possible to find a person that loves you, challenges you and truly makes you a better version of yourself. It is because at the ripe age of 21 – and probably into my late 20’s – I am not yet worthy of being in a union that powerful and important. I have to be the best version of myself as an individual before I am ready to be one half of a stronger whole.
Maturity unfortunately does not always come with age but a better sense of who you are and what you want out of life usually does. Conquering a quarter-life crisis is an easier thing to do when aren’t tied to another person emotionally and financially.
Just because I am not currently sporting an engagement ring, it doesn’t make my relationship any less significant. I could very well be with the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with but I want to be as positive as I can be before I can make that commitment. I won’t pretend that I know what makes a marriage last forever but I do know that I want to give mine the best odds possible, and for me that means waiting until the time is right.