Today I had the wonderful experience of visiting Georgia Southern University’s Financial Aid Office. 

During the hour of staring at the wall in the waiting room and waiting for my number to be called, I had an epiphany of five outlandish ideas to make a visit to the Financial Aid Office a more enjoyable experience for everyone. 

1. A Holiday Inn style breakfast bar

If you’re like me you’ll try to get to the Financial Aid Office as early as possible to try to get in and out as fast as possible. 

However, if you’re also like me you’ll discover that it makes no difference how early you arrive. There will always be a minimum of 30 people waiting before you. 

While I’m staring at the wall waiting for the front desk to call number 41, it’d be nice to munch on a plate of hotel powder eggs and greasy sausage links.

Plus the line would be so long for the waffle iron that everyone would forget to complain about not being seen. 

2. Confetti and balloons to fall from the ceiling for every hundredth student 

This could be something similar to Wheel of Fortune when the player solves the final puzzle. 

When the student’s number gets called balloons and confetti would fall from the roof of the waiting room. Family members and friends could run up and hug the student as they eagerly throw away their ticket number. 

In all honesty if a student is number 100 they’ll need something like this to wake them up. 

I’m not sure if we could get Pat Sajak or Vanna White in on it but it’s worth a shot.  

3. A putt putt course 

This one would require a bit of renovations to the waiting room but I think it’ll definitely be worth it. 

I picture this being at least a four yard stretch of beautiful creeping bent grass going through the center of the Financial Aid Office. 

It could have a giant statue of Interim President Shelley Nickel leaning on a windmill that you would have to putt through. 

To make the stakes a bit higher we’ll say if you land a hole in one you can hop six spaces in the waiting line. 

4. A happy hour

If I’m going to be sitting anywhere for at least an hour in the afternoon it’d be nice to have a cold beer. If I’m the only one I’ll shut up. 

I’m not saying there has to be a full service bar in the waiting room but maybe some Eagle Creek or Blue Moon on tap would be nice. 

Of course there’d be I.D. checks. I’m definitely not condoning underage drinking. Sorry kiddos. 

5. Invest in Lazy Boy recliners 

At about the 30 minute mark during my visit I notice a guy sitting two rows behind me who was knocked out asleep. 

The poor guy was all slouched over the chair in the most uncomfortable way. The seating in the waiting room is definitely not fit for napping and we all know that if you try to sleep in a classroom style chair you’re going to wake up with a neck pain from hell. 

I know this is a costly idea but I’d definitely be willing to help move them in free of charge. I call first nap!

In all seriousness 

In all seriousness, I think the Office of Financial Aid is doing the best they can with the resources they have. Every time I’ve gone I’ve met some of the nicest and most helpful people on campus. 

Realistically, I think a simple coffee bar or a TV would be amazing. I’d even settle for a half hour special of Judge Judy.

Matthew Enfinger, The George-Anne Editor-in-Chief, gaeditor@georgiasouthern.edu.