Recently, I decided to work on getting into shape. I go to the RAC Monday through Thursday, and while going nowhere on the elliptical, I’ve realized there are only about 6 types of people at the RAC:

1. Sexy Socialite. She’s the girl who’s ready to be crowned Miss America—whose makeup looks airbrushed and who never has a hair out of place. Her outfit and shoes match perfectly—you suspect her ensemble was designed by Chanel or Prada. Sometimes she lifts 5-10 pound weights, but mostly she wanders around flirting with hot guys.

2. Juiced-up Jock. You know him—the extremely muscular guy who wears a tank top that’s so cut up it barely covers his pecs. He deadlifts hundreds of pounds, carries a jug of water to class and drinks protein shakes like they’re lattes. At the RAC, he rarely removes his headphones and even more rarely speaks to anyone, unless it’s the Sexy Socialite.

3. Pinterest Peruser. Her workout is on Pinterest so her eyes remain glued to her phone. Beware of approaching her from behind because she’s so focused that a simple tap on the shoulder will scare her to death.

4. Creepy Old Dude. He probably pays hundreds of dollars for yearly RAC privileges, and he’s typically in the RAC when the pretty girls are exercising. He drifts from machine to machine sweats profusely. Inevitably, whenever a girl is using the super-awkward inner-thigh machines, that COD is nearby. Watching. Smiling. Creeping.

5. Alarming Anorexic—she’s literally skin and bones.There should be rules against her exercising! She really needs to be eating burgers and onion rings at Cookout because she is scary skinny. Someone stop her. Someone feed her.

6. Genuine Gym-Goer. This is someone like me who has goals and wants to get in shape. We’re not looking to get swoll or to be twigs—just healthy. We smile politely, trying not to get frustrated when the Juiced-Up Jock hogs one machine for a whole hour.

If you see me at the RAC anytime soon, feel free to say “hello”. And don’t worry—I only use the same machine for about 10 minutes, so you can have it next.

Emma Collins

Senior Marketing and Sales major from Lincolnton, Georgia.

Sports Reporter